And the Cry of my Heart is to Bring You Praise

"From the Inside Out" is a song I woke up singing today. We sang it at church this past Sunday and I just love it! If you don't want to listen to the whole video, skip to about 2:30....that's where it really gets good!
I was sitting here thinking about the change in my heart that has taken place these past six months. Before, I would've seen this video, with all the people's hands raised high in worship, and I would've thought, "What in the world is that all about? I love Jesus. I pray. I have a relationship with Him. But, I don't get why they're being like that. Why are they raising their hands? Why are their eyes closed? Why do they have to act like that......just to put on a show?"
But, that was before I prayed for Him to show me what He's really all about. I can't explain it, but I just know that something in my heart changed. You will hear people who try to share their faith say that you just can't tell someone about Jesus, they have to experience it themselves. If you want proof that God exists, ask Him to show you and then you will have proof. It's as simple as that, because once you do, your heart will change and you will start liking things you never liked before, you will be moved by worship like you've never been before, you will behave in ways that you never thought possible, you will be convicted over things that you never thought twice about before, and the cry of your heart will be to bring Him praise.
There's just no other way I can explain it, but that's the part of the song that gets to me.....and the cry of my heart is to bring You praise. That is what changed in me. All of a sudden, I became consumed and all I really care about in life is bringing Him praise. It's not about trying to act a certain way so that people will know I'm a Christian, it's not about putting on a show, it's not about going to church just so I can tell people that I go to church. It's not about me becoming sinless or perfect either, because that will never happen! It's about being consumed with a desire to live my life for Him. It is real and it is something that I truly wish for everyone to experience.
It's scary at times because most people truly do not get it. I never got it before either. I struggle daily with a million opportunities in front of me now to serve Him and I don't even know where to begin. I was approached by a man and a little boy in the parking lot of Walmart the other day, asking for money because they had nothing. It broke my heart. I had nothing to give them, no cash on me. I went in Walmart almost in tears. I thought about all the things I should've done......I could've told them to come with me and bought them some food. Why didn't I do that? I should've turned back around and told them to come with me, but I didn't. So, when I checked out, I got $20 and I went looking for them, but they were nowhere to be found. I failed once again at an opportunity to love others the way that Jesus commanded us to do.
The old me would've asked myself what in the world the new me was doing! I learned a very valuable lesson from that book "Same Kind of Different As Me." Denver, the homeless man from the book, said that if a homeless person asks you for money, they may very well buy liquor with it, but that may be the only way they know how to survive the horrendous conditions that they are faced with. Have you ever thought about it that way? Can you imagine how you would learn to cope with a life like that? So, before we judge people who are faced with that kind of life, we need to just love them, even if they are unlovable, because that is what Jesus told us to do.
Can you imagine how different our world would be if we simply loved everyone, instead of judging them? I think that is how we can bring Him praise the most. Being a Christian doesn't mean that I became perfect all of a sudden, but it should mean that I try my best to love others so that they will feel His love through me. It's about giving Him control to show us how to do that and that is what I am trying so hard to do. I am thankful that despite the fact that I fail 99% of the time, He hasn't given up on me. I don't know the plans He has for me yet, but I do know that no matter what He ever brings my way, I will continue to praise Him because His love is everlasting and while people will continue to let me down, He never will.